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Subject: RE: [soa-rm-ra] RE: Section 3 - latest draft


Jeff,
I've taken on board most of your edits, with the exception of the following:
726 - I think it would indeed add confusion so don't propose to take this.
738 - We addressed this in a different way, defining actor as a "human or
non-human agent", a phrase we use elsewhere
746 - I agree with your concern. Semi-automated is thus deleted
889 - 'owner' role is removed, as it is not defined

Peter

| -----Original Message-----
| From: Estefan, Jeff A (3100) [mailto:jeffrey.a.estefan@jpl.nasa.gov]
| Sent: Monday, 11 April 2011 12:33
| To: soa-rm-ra@lists.oasis-open.org
| Subject: [soa-rm-ra] RE: Section 3 - latest draft
| 
| Peter and Chris,
| 
| Looks like we've finally made it over the hump.  Latest Sect 3 draft looks
really
| good.  Couple of mostly minor editorial comments below.  Think it's about
time
| to tie this one down.  I'll work on updating/creating the associated UML
models.
| Right now, my machine is being repaired so I don't have access to MD.
Hope to
| get to it sometime this week.
| 
| Regards...
| 
|  - Jeff
| 
| Line 555:  We had adopted the editorial standard to use "View" in Title
case
| when we called out or referenced to the View name, e.g., Participation in
a SOA
| Ecosystem View (vs. view).
| 
| Line 580.  Same as 555.
| 
| Line 583.  Recommend adding "As stated ealier" before sentence that starts
with
| "The OAISS SOA RM defines SOA...".  Otherwise, this looks like a
duplication of
| lines 567-569.
| 
| Line 605:  Recommend putting "execution context" in bold face type (first
| occurrence).
| 
| Line 622:  Recommend putting "delegates" in bold face type (first
occurrence).
| 
| Line 631:  The concept of "service actions" is no longer defined anywhere
in this
| View.   Should this be "the action model" and/or "joint actions" (in
bold)?
| 
| Line 672:  Are we using RAF for shorthand or SOA-RAF?  Sometimes we use
| hyphen, sometimes not and same with RM (or SOA-RM).  Think we should be
| consistent throughout and preference for the shorthand would be consistent
| with the listed standards on the OASIS site (and in the case of the RM, it
is SOA-
| RM so by extrapolation, think we should use SOA-RAF.
| 
| Line 677:   Extra period at the end of the sentence.
| 
| Line 726:  Should we consider showing SOA Ecosystem and SOA-Based System
at
| a higher level of the class hierarchy in Fig. 5?  Just a thought but
perhaps not if it
| will only introduce additional confusion.  Just trying to be consistent
with the
| updated text.
| 
| Line 738:  Recommend changing "is a participant or delegate" to "is an
entity".
| This makes it more general and we do not need to formally define entity.
It also
| solves the circular hierarchy issue.
| 
| Line 746:  What is meant by "semi-automated" agent?
| 
| Lines 770-771:  Change "and the actions that participant may performs" to
"and
| the actions that a participant may perform".
| 
| Line 803:  Erroneous period between the words "concerned" and "even".
| 
| Line 849:  Perhaps find a better forward reference than "later on".  I see
the
| actual referenced section number is cross-out but leaving it in would read
more
| professionally.
| 
| Line 889:  Concept of "owner" is shown in bold face type but is not
formally
| defined in the text.  Ownership is but Owner is not.  In addition, an
owner is
| referred to as a role but it is not modeled in the subsection on service
roles.
| 
| Line 1018  Extra period at the end of the sentence.
| 
| Line 1088:  Is risk indeed a "private" assessment?  Don't want to belabor
the
| point or get into a long debate.  Just asking when wearing a PM hat.
| 
| Line 1157:  Need blank spaces at the end of the sentence "for satisfying
them"
| followed by the sentence that starts with "These".
| 
| Line 1175:  Word "possible" is part of the previous paragraph and should
not be
| split between its owning paragraph and Fig. 9.
| 
| Line 1261:  Need to state in the text that follows this new formal
definition of
| RWE why it is different from what was defined in the SOA-RM.  It is OK to
| overload the original definition in order to give the term more
specificity or
| context but we should state an argument why we choose to overload the
| originally defined term.
| 
| 
| 
| 
| 
| 
| 
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