Nice.
I will leave it to those on the TC longer to deal with other issues, but the narrative flow, and the graphic impact are greatly improved.
This is now something I could email to someone and ask if they want to discuss tomorrow, which is a lens I like to use.
Nice Job.
tc
Sent: Tuesday, October 23, 2018 5:16 AM
To: coel@lists.oasis-open.org
Subject: [coel] RE: Draft Slide Deck
Toby and I had a long chat in our Friday slot to bring his feedback into the presentation:
- Try to reduce the word density of the slides (give listeners early access to the brief document id they want more information).
- Set-up some more tension with a statement of the problem and then solution.
- Retitle the specification slide as an overview (more engaging).
- The URLs are great for later reference but don’t open during the presentation.
- Add a call to action.
- Make the last slide background less generic and more interesting to support questions.
I have made those changes in the attached deck – not so much a v2 as another option. If we agree the final deck in our call on Friday, we can post them to the COEL email and ask Jane to circulate a link at the start of the meeting. This will give the audience access to all the linked material.
Regards
Joss
Important Information: The contents of this email are intended for the named addresses only and contain information which is confidential and which may also be privileged. Unless you are the named addressee (or authorised to receive for the addressee) you may not copy, use it, or disclose it to anyone else. If you received it in error, please notify us immediately at info@geneactiv.co.uk and then destroy it. Further, whilst we make efforts to keep our network free from computer viruses, etc., you do need to check this email and any attachments to it for viruses as we can take no responsibility for any viruses which might be transferred by way of this email.
Activinsights Limited, 6 Nene Road, Bicton Industrial Park, Kimbolton, Cambs, PE28 0LF, UK. A company registered in England & Wales. Registered number: 6576069
From: Joss Langford
Sent: 16 October 2018 12:06
To: coel@lists.oasis-open.org
Subject: RE: Draft Slide Deck
I have made a first run at a complete pack for comment.
We were also asked whether there was any pre-read so I pulled together the attached briefing sheet.
Joss
Important Information: The contents of this email are intended for the named addresses only and contain information which is confidential and which may also be privileged. Unless you are the named addressee (or authorised to receive for the addressee) you may not copy, use it, or disclose it to anyone else. If you received it in error, please notify us immediately at info@geneactiv.co.uk and then destroy it. Further, whilst we make efforts to keep our network free from computer viruses, etc., you do need to check this email and any attachments to it for viruses as we can take no responsibility for any viruses which might be transferred by way of this email.
Activinsights Limited, 6 Nene Road, Bicton Industrial Park, Kimbolton, Cambs, PE28 0LF, UK. A company registered in England & Wales. Registered number: 6576069
From:
coel@lists.oasis-open.org <coel@lists.oasis-open.org>
On Behalf Of dave.snelling@uk.fujitsu.com
Sent: 12 October 2018 16:06
To:
coel@lists.oasis-open.org
Subject: [coel] Draft Slide Deck
Folks,
Here is a starter for 10.
Dr. David Snelling
Fujitsu Distinguished Engineer
Fujitsu Fellow
Program Director Artificial Intelligence
CTO Office EMEIA
Fujitsu
Mob: +44 (0) 7590-293439
Email: Dave.Snelling@UK.Fujitsu.com
Web: uk.fujitsu.com
Fujitsu is proud to partner with Action for Children
P Please consider the environment - do you really need to print this email?
Unless otherwise stated, this email has been sent from Fujitsu Services Limited (registered in England No 96056); Fujitsu EMEA PLC (registered in England No 2216100) both with registered offices at: 22 Baker Street, London W1U 3BW; PFU (EMEA) Limited, (registered
in England No 1578652) and Fujitsu Laboratories of Europe Limited (registered in England No. 4153469) both with registered offices at: Hayes Park Central, Hayes End Road, Hayes, Middlesex, UB4 8FE.
This email is only for the use of its intended recipient. Its contents are subject to a duty of confidence and may be privileged. Fujitsu does not guarantee that this email has not been intercepted and amended or that it is virus-free.