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Subject: Minor revisions to pbd-se-v1 0-wd04R1.docx


Attached are some editorial touch-ups to the new draft spec version, showing all revisions.

Basically, I have:

·         Fixed a couple small typos (e.g. dates of publication, missing periods)

·         Fixed some formatting (e.g. colored fonts, paragraph spacing, etc)

·         removed some duplication (e.g. “(PbD)” and “(FIPPs)”)

·         made more consistent certain key terms, notably

o   Privacy by Design (vs. “privacy-by-design”, “privacy by design”, and “Privacy by Design” unless part of a document title,

o   “personal data” vs “personal information or “personally-identifiable information”

·         Made minor corrections to the PbD principles and discussion in Section 2 and to the “Sub-Principles” in section 4

·         There are also a couple comments embedded regarding use of some terminology, e.g. PbD requirements

·         The revised document is attached and renamed pbd-se-v1 0-wd04R1+fc.docx

Thanks, Fred


Attachment: pbd-se-v1 0-wd04R1+fc.docx
Description: pbd-se-v1 0-wd04R1+fc.docx

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