Re: [tm-pubsubj-comment] Comments required

[Lars Marius Garshol <larsga@garshol.priv.no>]

* Steve Pepper
|
| A new draft of the Gentle Introduction to Published Subjects is
| available at http://www.ontopia.net/tmp/pubsubj-gentle-intro.htm.

--- General comments:

Should the document state explicitly that it is reusing the
terminology defined in ISO 13250? It now redefines (or more correctly,
explains) the terms in 13250, but that's nowhere apparent.

Generally the language used throughout is rather formal and heavy to
read. Lightening it up a bit would probably be a good idea. Despite
this it is overall quite clear and understandable.

--- Specific comments:

First reaction: section 1 is very heavy reading. Not sure many people
will actually be able to read it.

2.2: Here we are not in line with the Reference Model, since what it
calls SLUO we call CO. One or the other should be fixed. (CO is
certainly a lot more attractive than SLUO.)

2.2: "points of collocation"? I liked "binding points" better.

2.2: s/correspondance/correspondence/

2.4.3: I think a syntax example is a good thing (maybe as 2.4.4?)
       since that helps people see what is going on.

3.2.1: The note is doubly inappropriate:
        a) it's a requirement cloaked as a note,
        b) it's trespassing on the turf of the next deliverable.

       I would take it out. (Or, even better, break this document in
       two pieces, a gentle intro, and a "requirements and
       recommendations" document that includes the next deliverable.)

3.2.3: s/necessary/necessarily/

If 3.2.4 and 3.2.5 are acceptable I would think that a 3.2.6 would
also be in order:

  "A Published Subject Indicator should include its Published Subject
  Identifier."

since it's crucial that everyone know what the identifier is.

-- 
Lars Marius Garshol, Ontopian         <URL: http://www.ontopia.net >
GSM: +47 98 21 55 50                  <URL: http://www.garshol.priv.no >


----------------------------------------------------------------
To subscribe or unsubscribe from this elist use the subscription
manager: <http://lists.oasis-open.org/ob/adm.pl>