Editorial nits for RM and RM Policy

[Marc Goodner <mgoodner@microsoft.com>]

Editorial issues in WS-RM

 

1. Section 2

Change “…by the RM Source, of unacknowledged  message.”

to “…by the RM Source, of an unacknowledged message."

 

2. Section 2.1 Glossary

“Acknowledgement Request: A message containing a  AckRequested header.”

Change “a” to “an”.

“Sequence Traffic Messsage: A message containing a Sequence header block.”

Change “Messsage” to “Message”.

3. Section 2.4 Example Message Exchange

Figure 2 has unnecessary spaces in text.

“and and reclaims any resources associated with the Sequence”

Change “and and” to “and”.

4. Section 3.2 Considerations on the Use of "Piggy-Backing"

This section uses the acronym “EPR” without it being defined.

5. 3.4 Sequence Creation incorrect extensibility description

/wsrm:CreateSequence/wsrm:Offer/@{any}

/wsrm:CreateSequenceResponse/wsrm:Accept/@{any}

“This is an extensibility mechanism to allow different (extensible) types of information, based on a schema, to be passed.”

This appears to be the /{any} description rather than the proper /{@any} description as follows.

“This is an extensibility mechanism to allow additional attributes, based on schemas, to be added to the element”

6. Section 3.8 incorrect reference

reference to section 3.1 should be 3.4

7. /wsrm:CreateSequenceResponse/wsrm:Expires

“causing the Sequence to be silently teriminated”

Change “teriminated” to “terminated”.

8. Section 3.9 Sequence Acknowledgement

“on any SOAP envelope targetted to the endpoint referenced”

Change “targeted” to “targeted”.

9. Section 3.9 Sequence Acknowledgement

“It contains a range of Sequence MessageNumbers”

There is no element “MessageNumbers”. I suggest using “MessageNumber’s” or the English phrase “message numbers”.

10. 4.4 Invalid Acknowledgement, Condition box

“SequenceKnowledgement” should be “SequenceAknowledgement“

Reference to Section 3.6 should be 3.9.

11. 4.6 Create Sequence Refused

Capitalize “create” in “[Reason] create Sequence…”

12. Section 4.5 Message Number Rollover

“RM Desi nation SHOULD continue to accept undelivered”

Change “Desi nation” to “Destination”.

13. Section 4.9 Unsupported Selection

“in the extensibility section of the message that is not support.ed”

Change “support.ed” to “supported”.

14. Section 5 Security Threats and Countermeasures

“For example, if an attacker is able to swap Sequence headers on message”

The font size used for “Sequence” is too small.  This problem is pervasive in this section and makes it very hard to read the header/element names.

15. Section 5.2 Security Solutions and Technologies

“Secondly, the RM Destination to performs an authorization check against this authenticated identity and determines if the RM Source is permitted to create Sequences with the RM Destination.”

Change “to performs” to “performs”.

16. Section 5.2.1 Transport Layer Security

“This section describes how the the facilities”

Change “the the” to “the”.

17. Section 5.2.1.2 Countermeasure Implementation

“Subsequent to the establishment of the the”

 Change “the the” to “the”.

18. Section 5.2.2.2 Countermeasure Implementation

‘Issues specific to the life-cycle management of WS-SecurityConversation”

Change “SecurityConversation” to “SecureConversation”.  Search for this error globally.

19. 6.1 Securing Sequences Using WS-Security

“When a RM Source Transmits a CreateSequence that has been extended to include a wsse:SecurityTokenReference it SHOULD ensure that the RM Destination both understands and will conform with the requirements listed above.”

Change “Transmits” to “transmits”. Change “will conform with” to “will conform to”.

20. References

[SOAP 1.1]

W3C Note, "SOAP: Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1," 08 May 2000

 

ALL of the references should have the URI of the reference in clear text so it is visible in printed copies of the specification.  For example change the above reference to the following:

 

[SOAP 1.1]

W3C Note, "SOAP: Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1," 08 May 2000

http://www.w3.org/TR/2000/NOTE-SOAP-20000508/

 

21. SOAP 1.1 reference

[SOAP 1.1]

W3C Note, "SOAP: Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1," 08 May 2000.

Change “W3C Note” to “W3C Member Submission” (to match other similar references).

 

22. XML and schema references

[XML]

W3C Recommendation, "Extensible Markup Language (XML) 1.0 (Second Edition)", October 2000.

Is there any reason to not refer to the more recent Fourth Edition?

[XML-Schema Part1]

W3C Recommendation, "XML Schema Part 1: Structures," 2 May 2001.

[XML-Schema Part2]

W3C Recommendation, "XML Schema Part 2: Datatypes," 2 May 2001

The XML Schema references could also be updated.  Should they refer to the second edition?

23. BSP reference

[BSP 1.0]

WS-I Working Group Draft. "Basic Security Profile Version 1.0," March 2006

The date of the referenced document is August 2006.

 

24. RDDL reference

[RDDL 2.0]

 “Johnathan Borden” change “Johnathan” to “Jonathan”.

25. Inconsistent use of bold

 

Note in the following text that some of the content model items are in bold and some are not.  I think they are all meant to be in bold.

 

/wsrm:CreateSequence

…

 

/wsrm:CreateSequence/wsrm:AcksTo

…

 

/wsrm:CreateSequence/wsrm:Expires

 

26. Content model introduction inconsistent

From Section 3.7 Sequences, “The following describes the content model of the Sequence header block.

/wsrm:Sequence”

 

I prefer this form of introduction to the content model text.  Unfortunately it is NOT used in many other sections.  I would prefer if the other sections used this text.  This would also separate the exemplar from the description of the content model.

 

 

 

Editorial issues in HTML version of WS-RM

1. WSRMP XML Schema file, Appendix B
The indentation in the Schema XML is lost.  

2. Lost shading  
There are several place is WSRMP where the shading on an XML fragment has been lost.  This makes the text hard to read. 
For example:   The normative outline for the Sequence STR Assertion is:
<wsrmp:SequenceSTR [wsp:Optional="true"]? ... /> </wsrmp:SequenceSTR>  
Note that this problem was fixed in WS-RM but apparently not in WS-RMP.

 

 

Editorial issues in RM Policy

1. 2.2 Normative Outline

Three out of the four items in this section have their description in italics and one does not.  This inconsistency should be fixed.

2. Section 2.3 Assertion Attachment

“There might be certain RM implementations that are incapable of applying RM QoS semantics”

 

“QoS” is never defined.  Replace with “Quality of Service (QoS)”.

 

3. Section 2.5.1 Sequence STR Assertion

 

“/wsrm:SequenceSTR /@wsp:Optional="true" “

 

There is an unneeded blank space after “wsrm:SequenceSTR” and before the “/”.  This should be removed.

 

Note this problem exists in several other places in the document.

 

4. Section 4 References

 

[SOAP 1.1]

W3C Note, "SOAP: Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1," 08 May 2000

 

ALL of the references should have the URI of the reference in clear text so it is visible in printed copies of the specification.  For example change the above reference to the following:

 

[SOAP 1.1]

W3C Note, "SOAP: Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1," 08 May 2000

http://www.w3.org/TR/2000/NOTE-SOAP-20000508/

 

5. SOAP 1.1 reference

 

[SOAP 1.1]

W3C Note, "SOAP: Simple Object Access Protocol 1.1," 08 May 2000.

Change “W3C Note” to “W3C Member Submission” (to match other similar references).

 

6. [WS-RM] reference

OASIS WS-RX Technical Committee Draft, "Web Services Reliable Messaging (WS-ReliableMessaging)," September 2005.

The date on this reference should be August 2006.

7. XML and schema references

 

[XML]

W3C Recommendation, "Extensible Markup Language (XML) 1.0 (Second Edition)", October 2000.

Is there any reason to not refer to the more recent Fourth Edition?

[XML-Schema Part1]

W3C Recommendation, "XML Schema Part 1: Structures," 2 May 2001.

[XML-Schema Part2]

W3C Recommendation, "XML Schema Part 2: Datatypes," 2 May 2001

The XML Schema references could also be updated.  Should they refer to the second edition?

8. RDDL reference

[RDDL 2.0] Reference

“Johnathan Borden” change “Johnathan” to “Jonathan”.

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