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Subject: RE: [soa-rm-ra] SOA RAF Security Section edits
Ken, The document you attached was Kevin’s 4th August edits – there were no additional edits or comments. Aside this, there were indeed a number of editing anomalies, which have now been corrected in the latest draft. All other edits agreed at the last meeting have
also been included. I will send this to you shortly and thus pass on the Gold Copy token – up to you then to see to the edits you refer to Kevin’s section 5.2.1… Cheers, Peter From: soa-rm-ra@lists.oasis-open.org [mailto:soa-rm-ra@lists.oasis-open.org]
On Behalf Of Ken Laskey I attempted a careful read through and my final comments are attached. There is some wordsmithing and a few things deleted
where they are redundant or don’t flow. The major substantive change is an addition at the end of section 5.2.1. During the call a few weeks ago, the discussion with Michael and Rex led to the paragraph about policy negotiation. The phrasing in numerous
places gave me an uncomfortable feeling of tight policy coupling; my added words are meant to address that. Ken --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dr. Kenneth Laskey MITRE Corporation, M/S H305 phone: 703-983-7934 7515 Colshire Drive fax: 703-983-1379 McLean VA 22102-7508 From: Kevin Smith
[mailto:kevintrentsmith@gmail.com]
All - thank you for your comments.. I just did another significant round of edits.
On Tue, Jul 31, 2012 at 6:21 PM, Ken Laskey <klaskey@mitre.org> wrote:
Kevin,
Attached is a markup of the security section. I made edits to substitute terms defined and used (hopefully) consistently in the rest of the document, and made some
pure wordsmithing suggestions where I found the text awkward. I had more significant issues with the Identity Propagation section. I captured these in the comment to the section 5.2.5.1 heading and then suggested some wording changes in the remainder of
the section.
Happy processing.
Ken
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dr. Kenneth Laskey
MITRE Corporation, M/S H305 phone:
703-983-7934
7515 Colshire Drive fax:
703-983-1379
McLean VA 22102-7508
From:
soa-rm-ra@lists.oasis-open.org [mailto:soa-rm-ra@lists.oasis-open.org]
On Behalf Of Kevin Smith
All, |
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