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Subject: correct attachment [was: [soa-rm-ra] SOA RAF Security Section edits]
Won’t do much good if I just attach Kevin’s documents and have you guess at my suggested edits :) Ken From: soa-rm-ra@lists.oasis-open.org [mailto:soa-rm-ra@lists.oasis-open.org] On Behalf Of Ken Laskey I attempted a careful read through and my final comments are attached. There is some wordsmithing and a few things deleted where they are redundant or don’t flow. The major substantive change is an addition at the end of section 5.2.1. During the call a few weeks ago, the discussion with Michael and Rex led to the paragraph about policy negotiation. The phrasing in numerous places gave me an uncomfortable feeling of tight policy coupling; my added words are meant to address that. Ken --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dr. Kenneth Laskey MITRE Corporation, M/S H305 phone: 703-983-7934 7515 Colshire Drive fax: 703-983-1379 McLean VA 22102-7508 From: Kevin Smith [mailto:kevintrentsmith@gmail.com] All - thank you for your comments.. I just did another significant round of edits. On Tue, Jul 31, 2012 at 6:21 PM, Ken Laskey <klaskey@mitre.org> wrote: Kevin, Attached is a markup of the security section. I made edits to substitute terms defined and used (hopefully) consistently in the rest of the document, and made some pure wordsmithing suggestions where I found the text awkward. I had more significant issues with the Identity Propagation section. I captured these in the comment to the section 5.2.5.1 heading and then suggested some wording changes in the remainder of the section. Happy processing. Ken --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dr. Kenneth Laskey MITRE Corporation, M/S H305 phone: 703-983-7934 7515 Colshire Drive fax: 703-983-1379 McLean VA 22102-7508 From: soa-rm-ra@lists.oasis-open.org [mailto:soa-rm-ra@lists.oasis-open.org] On Behalf Of Kevin Smith All, |
Attachment:
Security Model-KevinSmith-August4th-kjl.docx
Description: application/vnd.openxmlformats-officedocument.wordprocessingml.document
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